It's been a while, I'm sorry.  I don't know where to begin.  School is almost over thank goodness!  I had 4 shows at my school which is really 15 performances total.  They all happened from March till last week.  So I am so relieved they are over!  It's been a really hard semester.  The best part of my weeks is that I get to come home and see Tommy.  My son is growing up so fast.  He is so stinkin' cute.  Like I know all babies are cute, but my son is really cute, and I know I'm bias, but he is!  He is really sweet too.  Very gentle.  I wish he cuddled more, but they say that comes and goes.  I want to cuddle with him, but he is too busy to cuddle, he is crawling and trying to walk on his own, and getting into everything!  Recently his mission is to get into the kitchen!  Tommy had a great birthday party last weekend, just a small affair, family, some local friends.  We all had a fun I think. It reminded me of the family get togethers we used to have at my old house in NY, it was fun.  It all makes me want more kids.  Which at the rate I'm loosing/gaining weight, I mine as well be pregnant again.  I'm so frustrated with this weight.  I can't loose it.  I need to find a diet that works for us, because I struggle with doing it by myself while watching my husband eat taco bell and chik-fil-a.  On top of which, I am struggling hard to find time to exercise.  I refuse to waste my time I have with Tommy when I only have a little time with him a day.  It's like, I only get him from about 4-4:30 till about 7:30, and that includes, dinner and bath time.  I don't want to waste that time at the gym.  And then once he is asleep, it's crunch time, it's dishes, laundry, bottles, cleaning, school work, bills, etc.  Once that's done it's about 9:30-10:30, and I don't want to work out that late, I want to sleep.  I know that it is technically not late, but I'm freakin' tired.  5:30am comes too early.  And so there you have it.  Sometimes I take Tommy out for walks with the stroller, but you can only go so fast pushing a stroller.  I don't have one of those jogging strollers, it's just a regular stroller.  I'm thinking of taking some Zumba classes this summer, there are some cheaper classes offered without a membership I think at the Community Center.  I hope to check that out once school gets out.  But until then, I'm not happy with the way I look.  Amplify that with the fact that my brother is getting married next week, and I look terrible in the stupid bridesmaid dress.  It's strapless, low cut, and short.  I look so big in this dress.  It is not made for my post baby body.  My sister will look great in this dress, it is a very flattering dress if you don't have a lot of cleavage, and are thin, it kinda helps bring out your shape...Not good when it's a big shape. UGH.  I've gotta figure something out. Ugh.  It's so frustrating.  I envy all you girls who are working out and doing 5ks and all that stuff.  I need to do that junk.  I cannot wait until summer.  I wish it were summer NOW!  I miss you ladies.  I can't wait to see you all at Nicky's wedding!  And hopefully more this summer.  Let's go to the beach and stuff!  Baby in tow, though, but still, it would be fun!

 Ok, More later.  Miss you all.

So I feel like complete crud.  Fevers are less, but congestion is more, my tongue and the inside of my mouth has these white pussy blisters and it hurts.  So far all I've eaten is ice pops and jello (maybe I'll at least loose a few pounds).  My throat is really swollen and these steroids are kicking my butt.  Oh well.  My mom showed up to take care of me, and she is being as nice as she can be for her.  She gets on my nerves though.  She knows I don't feel good and I've been like a moving zombie and she is sitting on the couch on her computer and her dog is barking last night.  Well it's 8 and Tommy just fell asleep, and I'm like, "mom, can you please do something about the dog, I don't want her to wake up Tommy," and she will not get up off her butt and take care of her dog, and what's more she gets on me to get up and do something about it.  What is the point of helping me, if you don't actually HELP!  GRRrrrr.  But oh well.  She is trying, in her own way.  Kevin was really sweet on Monday, he was so helpful, I think he was scared.  My fever spiked to 103 and I was really dizzy and almost passing out, and so he was trying to hard.  But last night, I could tell he was too tired to care, he just closed himself off in the bedroom and played on his computer all night, didn't offer to help me at all.  I am not saying I want them to wait on my hand and foot, but ladies back me up, when boys are sick, they whine and complain about every little thing.  Like it's the hardest thing in the world to get out of the recliner for a drink or to get a blanket.  But when we are sick we do EVERYTHING!  I've been sick since this weekend, and still, every night I have put Tommy to bed, I have cleaned up his toys (with gloves and a mask on, so I don't infect anything!) and I have made his bag for daycare, and all his bottles, etc. Still sick.  This morning I cleaned his toys and vacuumed where he plays, because it needed it.  Why don't the people who are helping me do this stuff.  Oh well, whatever.  I'm just glad to have some help I suppose.  

Being home sick this week has really made me miss Buddy.  My mom's dog, Cherie, she's not good for much, but she does come and cuddle with me here and there, and it just reminds me how Buddy would sit with me all day.  He was such a good dog.  Such a sweet dog.  I miss him so much.  Cherie found one of his toys yesterday and she has been playing with it today, and it makes me sad.  Lately I've been thinking I want another dog.  But in my head it's not another dog, it's just that I want Buddy back.  so definitely not this summer, but maybe summer 2013...I  don't know.  The longest I've gone without crying over him has been 2 weeks. So I guess when I go a little longer than that.

Going to try eating some Pastina tonight.  It's this little tiny mini stars that are pasta.  They are so tiny you have to have a special strainer to strain them, but you put just a touch of tomato sauce on it and eat it like soup.  Gonna try at least!  Hope my throat can handle it!

Tommy is getting sooo big!  He is just starting to cut his top 2 teeth, he has had the bottom 2 for about a month now.  Crawling is no problem now, even when he wont let go of his toy in his hand, and he is starting to pull himself up also.  He will walk if you hold his hands, but nothing on his own.  And he loves to JUMP!  We have the Jumperoo and the Johnny Jump up, he loves them both!  Can't wait for you guys to see him, he's so stinkin' cute!  He is getting his first hair cut right now.  It was supposed to be all 3 of us getting our hair cuts, but since I'm sick now it's just the 2 boys.  My mom went to go take pictures though so I wouldn't totally miss out.  No more fo-hawk when Tommy gets home!  Just yesterday I was pregnant, I blinked and he was born, and now he is crawling, and getting his hair cut and all sorts of stuff.  It's flying by!

I hope everyone is doing well, miss you guys!